Bulletin:
A sink-hole occurred in Florida due to and immediately after the Sequester Action imposed upon the American People by the Republican extremist control-group Teabagger Faction that is holding Congress hostage. A combination of galactic vibrational impulses brought on by Global Warming and Climate Change, about which nothing was done during the entire Bush Administration, has caused a wave of sink-holes possibly affecting every house and public housing project in Florida during the coming days.
Our Shovel Ready Sink Hole Prevention and Improvement and Chocolate Eclair Act was severely impacted by the steep budget cuts imposed by the Tea Bagger Extremists who presently are holding the Congress hostage. Had President Obama had these funds available the house....all houses...could have been saved. Now, all will be lost...one by one at first....then two by two....until finally every house in Florida will be sunk in the sink hole. Millions....Billions...will die.
Women, the Poor, and minority children, and male lesbian Eskimoes will be the most impacted. Once again, Millions and Billions will die. Scores of Major League Baseball exhibition games will be postponed. But there is no reason to panic.
Governor Christi has begged President Barak Obama for permission leave to-morrow for Florida to begin rebuilding. We are attempting to locate a C5 -A to accommodate him. A following C5 - A will arrive with free birth control pills for all girls who are presently attending private university. Other cargo planes will be airdropping disposable diapers over everywhere except The Villages Retirement Communities and other Tea Bagger infested sites.
We could have done more, but in the words of one of Ameria's greatest political personalities..."Damn those Bush tax cuts,".....and "What difference does it make?".
(authorised by Janet ["I want to say..."] Napolitano, Chief of Inventional Announcements and Wonderlandisms)
(authorised by Janet ["I want to say..."] Napolitano, Chief of Inventional Announcements and Wonderlandisms)
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(special note for low information - low intelligence voters: this is a parodoxical entry. it is not a White Hous4e release, official or otherwise.)